AnimalsJokes Snails Are Not Known For Their Excessive Speed. This Will Make You Go ROFL. 8k Views Jacque is a snail. Snails are not known for their excessive speed. Jacque has always dreamed of going fast, faster than any snail ever has before. Jacque has been saving his money for years so he can buy a super fast sports car and impress all his little snail friends. Finally, Jacque goes down to the Porsche dealer. He sees a beautiful car, the Boxster. He tells the dealer, “I like that one.” The dealer laughs and says, “My dear snail, don’t you want to go fast? You need the Porsche Boxster-S!” He seems very proud of the S. Jacque agrees, and finally, he is sitting in the car of his dreams, a Boxster-S. He pays for it. Cash, because this snail doesn’t play around. He’s ready to take his brand new sports car for a speedy run down the coast. As he is driving, going well over 100 mph, much faster than any snail in the history of snails has ever gone, he flies past two French people walking on the side of the road. One Frenchman says to the other, “Wow! Look at that S-car go!” See more Previous joke An Elderly Pope Goes To New York. Next joke A Wife Is Having S** With Her Husband's Best Friend.